Monday, May 30, 2011

I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice.

Although we have over a hundred posts on When We Swam, we have yet to write a single entry on the major motion picture known as Road House (1989). A huge oversight on our part, my apologies.

Road House is possibly one of the GREATEST MOVIES OF OUR TIME. It speaks of a world that resembles our own but abides by different rules. It is lawless Swayze country, in which Jeff Healey is the headlining (and only) act in a tough bar in a tough town that is run by a tough old business magnate that is trying to run Swayze and his friends out of said tough town. Swayze's character, Dalton, is brought in to tame the Double Deuce, an unruly bar that is in desperate need of a stiff arm enrobed in tight denim. The task proves challenging in the face of Wesley, Dalton's wealthy nemesis who is systematically trying to kill everyone he knows. The antics at the Double Deuce become too overwhelming for Dalton, and he seeks the council of his mentor Wade Garrett, a "legendary" (aka old) bouncer whose slight frame indicates he used to do soundcheck at bars, rather than regulate them.

The film has it all - arson, motorcycles, blonde bombshells, even a scene in which Dalton RIPS OUT A MAN'S THROAT WITH HIS BARE HANDS. The film ends with a dramatic and orderly shooting in Wesley's home, in which all kinds of law-abiding citizens kill Wesley and his henchman, taking back the night without legal repercussions. Our protagonist returns to the now safe Double Deuce, which continues to play Jeff Healey and sling pony-necked beers, as if a horrendous murder did not just occur days prior.

A triumph!